Healing through memories
Good morning and welcome back to a new week.
This week I’ll be exploring how healing through memories can be a part of a positive grieving process. So, if you’d like to explore more about healing through memories then keep reading.
Grief
As we’ve already explored, grief is a very personal journey. What works for one of us may be detrimental to another. Some of us may choose to actively seek support to assist with our own grieving process whilst others of us may choose just to ‘survive’ this awful journey in any way we can.
However you approach grief just know you are not alone and there are many places to seek support if you need. Also, I’m here to say that however your grief journey looks, there is no right or wrong or ‘one size fits all’.
Know that wherever you are, you’re doing ok and if you feel that you really are struggling then please reach out for support.
You’ll find the contact number for the Samaritans at the bottom of my blog. - if you need to pick up the phone and talk to someone that will listen and understand then please do.
Memories
Our memories play a big part in the grieving process. Often when losing someone we care about, our minds are awash with horrible and often traumatic thoughts and memories of our last moments with that person and sadly last moments spent with someone taking their last breaths can often replace the comforting and happy memories of that someone special that we hold so dear to us.
So here it’s important to note that the memories I’m referring to are the positive and happy memories that we’ve spent time building with that special someone.
Whether that be the special words of love and advice they gave you during that short term friendship or the many happy years you spent together.
When processing grief it’s natural to focus on the loss that we’ve been through and the sadness we feel having to move forward without that huge part of us however I have learned through my own experiences that grieving is a privilege denied to many.
In the words of A.A Milne “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying Goodbye so hard”.
For a lot of us, to experience the sadness and pain of grief speaks volumes about the impact that person had on us and the many positive and happy memories we will always hold in our hearts.
Please understand that everyone has a very personal experience with loss, and I appreciate that to some who have been robbed of loving memories that this will not be the case.
Healing
Whilst healing is an ongoing part of any grief journey, healing is an essential phase that we all hope to reach at some stage. Whilst many of us are fortunate to have amazing friends and family to support us, sadly others embark on this journey alone.
Whilst I appreciate there are many other avenues of support out there, I hope that by tuning into my weekly blogs I might be able to offer some alternative support.
Healing through memories examples:
Building a photo scrap book
This is one thing that I did when I lost my Mum in December 2022. Faced with hundreds of photos and not knowing how to store them, I decided to choose all my favourites and add them to my own memory book so that it would not be shut away like a photo album and forgotten. whilst building this book it actually gave me the inspiration for If Heaven had a postcode.
Building a photo scrap book is a lovely way to remind yourself of the happy and special times you shared, take a look at last week’s blog for more information on where you can find memorial scrap books to buy yourself.
If Heaven had a Postcode
My flagship book: ‘If Heaven had a Postcode’ promises to hold your hand through your own grief journey, providing you with a place of comfort that will help to validate your feelings and coach you through the seasons of grief.
With 88 pages of uplifting poetry heart felt illustrations and memorial ideas this ‘more than a memorial book’ will help you reignite precious memories with your loved one and build and everlasting memorial that you can add to year after year. Plant seeds, write messages to sea, and keep precious memories alive.
For more information on the book please visit the website If Heaven Had a Postcode - The only memorial book you’ll ever need to remember a loved one
“Your day will be a Sunday”.
In my flagship book ‘if Heaven had a Postcode’ page 82 features one of my favourite Poems ‘Sun Day’.
This poem references a special day of the week that you can reflect on that special someone. Annual celebration days can bring about feelings of emptiness and sorrow but by choosing one day of the week to reflect on happy memories it can help reduce anxiety of an approaching birthday or Anniversary and can help us feel connected to that someone special.
This doesn’t have to mean you spend the whole day feeling sad but dedicating a few minutes to them and lighting a candle or writing a letter (or plantable card from the book) might be enough to ignite those happy memories.
I hope that you can take something from this blog and that wherever you are in your grief journey you can begin healing through memories too.
Have a lovely week,
Sabrina x
The Samaritans contact number- 116123.
Or text ‘SHOUT’ to 85258